GTFOOHWTBS AWARDS 2010

10-The Rise of Hip Pop
Last year I wrote about autotune not knowing the evolution of Hip Pop had arrived.
I realized it when I saw young white girls crying because someone bilked them out
of money for a Nicki Minaj concert. (Nozzle to mouth pulls trigger.)

9-Kanye and Jay Z conspiracy
I haven’t seen such blatant black man ripping since Obama’s birth certificate
was put into question. Now I listen to all theories on the new world order, but do
you really think the old white men would let Kanye and Jigga  Man into their elite
club of world domination and world economy tinkering?  If anything it is another
ploy by old white men to yet again tear down successful black men. No? Prove me
otherwise. Until then, I don’t buy it.

8-No Sag Campaign
I realized this year that I really fund these asshole politicians and their asinine
and mostly misguided campaigns against public indecency.  I’d much rather they
start a campaign for police sensitivity training than a monitor for the annual teenage
fad. Thanks for wasting your time and tax payer money Senator Adams.

7-The WTC Mosque Controversy.
Remember this ? It was all the talk of the nation this year. The outrage over
the audacity Muslim worshipers having a place to practice their faith so close
to Ground Zero and the tittie bar. Guess what? After all that hubbub and Koran-burning
threats, they are still building it. Where are all those angry Americans now?

6-Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt
Watt D Fok! Fantasia, I remember being moved listening to sing on AI. I
thought you would take it to the game. But like many of our entertainers you
have to keep it real. Did you not learn from Dave Chappelle? Leave the hood
alone. Shit. Why must you go out of your way to prove how down you are.
Sad thing it didn’t work and you found yourself like the female Jaheim. So
what do you do to gain the attention of the audience you lost? You fake a
suicide. Ok maybe not fake, just a poorly attempted suicide. Shit the next
week she was on Oprah hyping her album. It’s a miracle!  Redemption in
a week. Yesssssss.

5-Technics Turntables Being Discontinued ( Stress’ Personal Beef)
I blame all you fake laptop DJ’s out there. Learn your craft and stop giving
away the secrets of hip hop you worthless sacks of camel balls.

4-The Democratic Party
Thanks for giving the president your undivided support. Now that you no longer
have the majority in the House, lets see how much your issues will be valued. Nice
way to back up you party’s leader. With your bickering about health care reform, WTC
Worker payouts and the tax break and unemployment extension, lets see how much
Obama has to ultimately bend. It’s like having T.O. on your already struggling squad,
with a proven superstar. ( sorry Bengals.) For shame, for fronting like all citizen needs
are being addressed when you all are worried about keeping your jobs. Cause let’s face
it, unemployment stats are harsh. Dust off them resumes Dems.


3-Soulja Boy caught loving up Kat Stacks
Oh dis nigga here. Not only was your swag severely gimped when you was caught huggin
up with this chick, but your age showed through. Listen lil g ( and I use that loosely) stop
hugging up these birds. You got burnt by the video and probably in the pants. She outed
your cocaine use, while you was in the bathroom. Wasn’t she on a HIV positive dating site.
Hoax? Do u really want to take a chance? Sorry fam. My love muscle is going now where
near that chick. As for you and yours. GO SEE THE DOCTOR!!!!!!!

2-The Sarah Palin Show
This is why other countries don’t like us. The majority of us are fuckin stupid. With
our toy dogs and complaining about the lack of cashiers at Starbucks. Then we let
our politicians play with our minds by watching them have potato sack races and
murder turkeys… Wait wrong footage. Anyway, if you do not see through this attempt
for party influence, u my friend are a sheep.

1-President Obama Hating
Ok. I know people who legitimately did not like Obama as a leader before
he came to term. Still I wonder would we have been better off with McCain
and Palin?’ Let’s look at the good Obama has done. Bailed out the tanking
economy, Universal healthcare passed, set up a nuclear peace treaty with
Russia, do ask don’t tell in the sack ( couldn’t resist), gave tax extensions
to the rich but got unemployment extended …. Lets face it this guys a fucking
rockstar. Well, to the rest of the world. Not here. Here he is another black guy
trying to prove validity in his decisions because he is inherently unfit to lead.
Oh and black folk tearing him down, good job. You are the reason there are
no “valid” black politicians. I would run for public office but I’d have to remove
the daggers from my back. Sensibility dies yet again.