There are certain foods you come up with in the kitchen for certain
reasons. You might be low on cash or trying to make what little cash
you have last longer than Charlie Sheen's prostitute expense account.
I remember one experiment from back in the day, called 'Jailhouse
Rock.' Don't even ask how we decided on that name. That concoction
was simple. One cup of ramen noodle soup mixed with Kraft Macaroni
and Cheese. I think I had that maybe once or twice and then it made
me sick as all get out. To this day I shudder whenever I smell Cup of
Noodles being cooked. In any event, hunger can inspire genius, like
chicken and waffles. Or it can lead you down a seriously trippy path.
I've watched 'Man vs. Food' on the Travel Channel enough to know
just how trippy it can get. But last week, KFC made it worse.
When I saw the first picture of their new Double Down sandwich(and
by the way, I don't know if they're trying to make a connection to
poker or not)I had to admit it looked real, REAL good. Two Original
Recipe boneless chicken filets serving as bread with two strips of
bacon and pepper jack cheese and a sauce. And I haven't eaten
pork in thirteen years. But then I started thinking about it fully. A
sandwich like that is an instant hangover remedy. The aroma alone
would make you forget those Irish car bombs you had before. You
could down one and instantly feel better.
Then the steel boot of pain would clamp down on your chest.
Let's be honest, this sandwich is 540 calories. It may not sound
like much in a proposed daily diet of 2,000 calories but add a
drink and a side and you're in trouble. Not to mention the fact
that you can't indulge in that too often. I know, I'm being a bit
melodramatic. But you have to realize, that a good part of KFC's
sales are going to come from the post-party crowd, those office
workers who don't have that much time to get something more
healthy and people in the 'hood who need to get something for
their hard-earned cash. And the common denominator is, if the
food tastes good, I need to eat. I'm not going to worry about my
health now. And we wonder why heart disease is up among
younger folks. It pays to realize that these fast food chains are
in the business of making money, not ensuring your health. The
KFC Double Down should be a warning sign to folks out there
about a good thing really isn't one.